Tonight I babysat a fabulous little tyke, ate the best kale salad I have ever had, stared down pieces of indispersed art in a cutish small victorian on the east side of Aspen, looked at fashion magazines, and fell into someone elses world for a few hours. I enjoy all of my random jobs and the people I get to meet in my many lives. I peek into others lives and see myself living them in different stages of my own time here on earth. We are all so elusive and the fun lies in the little style we carry around in our souls and present in our movements and expressive choices. So fun.
Driving home tonight I almost mis took the houses perched way up in the air as stars. I eventually sharpened my eye (arrggg, pirate eye) & witnessed the line of the mountains subtly cutting through the black edges seperating the land and the moons palace above it. I live in a little town creviced between 3d landmasses that sit in heavy solitude around me. I forget this fact when i am sandwiched in this little world but am awakened by it time and again. I love that open space surrounds me but am taken back that my life and where I take myself in this open space can remain so small when I remain on only familiar routes. It is easy to forget to get off the beaten track and explore something right around the corner. There are so many corners to turn arent there?
Now cozy in the bed with sheets crumbled around my body I relent to the day. So many different things penetrate my life right now. Real jobs, side businesses, personal needs, other peoples projects that I have been assigned to, my own need for more creativity and personal expression within it. Balance is key right now. So is peace of mind. And I know that something is missing.
Sometimes I wish life was just like black and white postcards. They ooze a sense of frivolousness and carefree seconds that happen that just when we seem to be ignoring them. These moments are captured in an unstrained light when put in black and white. Life is full of raw emotion in these photos. An affect that moves through my body like a full on frieght train running down from my throat to my heart to my belly bewildering every part in between occurs. Yet these unfaltered emotions dont feel heavy or condescending. They feel real and freeing. They make me smile in comfort that simplicity (with unassembled fashionable undertones), that romance (and eyes full of gracious adornment) , that spontaneaity (without too much thinking), chance encounters (no cell service), and naked honesty really do still exist.
When I was 13 my friend Tiffany and I would ride bikes up to the bookstore near her house and turn the racks of such beautiful pieces of art. The rack would spin and spin like a petite ballerina that I had complete control of, and each time I saw a postcard come around it was like I saw it again, but for the first time. The rest of the bookstore was a blur. I was in focus. And that is what such timeless photos can do, give you a chance to always start over and to find what you want to be in focus.
